Excerpts from the book, “Red Shoes and Kiva Ladders”

From Chapter 11, “Red Shoes and Kiva Ladders”

I remember that there was a laugh growing somewhere deep inside me. I was sitting there making more braided hair gifts when the laughter began navigating the curves of my bowels and blew past my lips with an explosion of good will. A calmness then prevailed. I realized that no one could hurt me while I was in the presence of Great Mystery. I should have known that whatever evil is out there would take every opportunity to destroy this belief. The opportunity came sooner than later.

Have you ever felt uneasy, like some ill wind was moving toward you, producing a helpless feeling? Indian mothers felt it when they held a child infected with smallpox. Soldiers feel it when incoming phosphorus-dipped .30-caliber shells go streaking past their heads. I felt it when my eyes found themselves glued to the hole made by Sheila’s finger.

There was a stirring there. Something was moving. Soon, the head of a white pit viper appeared. Very slowly, the head protruded from the opening, as the contractions of its body forced it out of the hole. It fell a few inches from this exit onto the dusty floor of the cave, immediately filtering the air for my scent. It moved to a position just to my left before another one came into view.One after the other, they formed a circular line of venom and muscle. I had been using the razor to cut the hair ties loose from the buffalo robe, and I actually cut myself to see if I was dreaming. Fright filled my being as the blood poured from my finger.

About twenty-five in all squirmed their way out of the hole and onto the area where the sand wall met the powdery surface. Each slithered with its head raised above the dust, looking at me. In their own good time, they came closer and closer. Some raised their heads higher – then with a whip of the tail, they poised into a striking position. Some were spitting and making hissing sounds. In a matter of minutes, I found myself surrounded by these patient killers. My destiny was about to be fulfilled – the dream of a casket was coming true. I didn’t know which would happen first- whether my eyes would burst due to the extreme rise in blood pressure, or whether my heart would just freeze up with terror. In either case, I knew I was about to die.

From Chapter 18, “Rocks in my Shoes”

We turned north just past the entrance to the Royal Gorge on Highway 9. We had made this trip many times since 1988, but this one is etched in our memory. The beauty of the snow-capped mountains and the winding road that followed the river all the way to the top of America. A pair of eagles circled above us as we crossed over the summit and coasted for miles into the valley below. A thunderous herd of buffalo ran unobstructed on the ranch just south of Hartsel. The journey was a train ride back in time, and my ticket had only just been punched.
We drove between huge outcroppings of rocks that stood as sentries over the sacred ground of the buffalo dance. Their presence left within us the feeling that they knew all along we were coming. It had been a long wait for them… they had been standing there for millions of years. They were old spirit people. They were dependable.

The national forest formed a garrison of aspen and pine just across the road to the east. Indian Head Mountain displayed the image of Two Guns White Calf in the brilliance of the afternoon sun. The shadows that formed around rock and charred wood duplicated his likeness perfectly. Two Guns is the Indian on the white man’s nickel.

Two aspen poles accentuated the opening onto the sacred grounds. These poles held up a sign that read ‘Myhkpiye.’ I didn’t know exactly what that meant, except that it had something to do with heaven. How appropriate!

Several hundred people were already putting up the arbor–a wooden structure overlaid with branches to protect the elderly from the sun and weather. Everyone was required to lend a hand. I was assigned the job of establishing the oihe tipi. I thought, ‘What an honor. Surely this was something special and sacred, especially with a name so rich in the Lakota language.’

Four fence posts were driven into the rocky terrain to hold up a blue canvas, forming a horseshoe-shaped corral. A five-gallon bucket, a roll of paper, and a container of lime were placed in the middle. At home we call them toilets.

From Chapter 25, “Itch”

The next four days of fasting and surviving without water on the mountain had begun. The time was right, the place was perfect, and the people were excited for me. They established the four corners of my quest site by encircling the base of the red oaks with the colors of my people. Grandpa Glen prayerfully set the hochokas, and Grandpa Red Eagle danced around the circle with the gourd, chattering for the spirit helpers to come.
Leah placed wooden bowls where the elder bid her, and Kelli filled them with spirit food. It was hard not to make eye contact with the two people I love most in this world, but I was going somewhere they were not yet prepared to visit. I knew that I had no right to force my will upon them, so I kept my heart open and my eyes shut.

Even though I heard them departing through the underbrush, I had the distinct feeling that I wasn’t alone. There was a shadow moving, without reason. Neither the wind nor my imagination had caused the movement. Someone was there! Maybe the ebony figure was the Wanagi, the ghost of the warrior from long ago. I reached into my pipe bag for some leather and tobacco to make an offering of peace for him. I stretched across the boundary of my circle and secured the tiny pouch to a limb.

“Ah hat taa hay!” I spoke out loud. “Be with me in peace!”